I Want You To Want To

Nobody in our house likes to do the dishes. What makes matters worse is that my wife and I have very different philosophies about how the dishes should be done. I’ll admit, her way is probably right. But saying she’s right and actually being motivated to do it her way are two very different things.

A line from a movie came up in one of my classes this week, in the middle of an argument between a couple:
“I want you to want to do the dishes!”
“Why would I want to do the dishes?”

Even 20 years after that movie came out, the quote sticks because anyone who’s been married or in a close relationship has probably had a version of that conversation. And here’s the thing: it’s not really about the dishes. They stumbled into something profoundly spiritual.

Christianity has a bit of a reputation for being full of “no-fun rules.” To an outsider, and honestly, even to many Christians, it can seem strange to give 10% of your income to God, to miss out on Sunday morning beach time, or to love your enemies. From the outside, those things look like chores, like doing the dishes.

But here’s the difference: God doesn’t call us to do these things to ruin our fun or because He can’t handle it Himself. He calls us to them because through the act of doing, our hearts are shaped, and our love for Him is shown.

And our attitude makes all the difference. There’s a big gap between inviting someone to church because “that’s what I’m supposed to do” and inviting them because you genuinely want them to encounter God’s love. There’s a difference between giving to the church out of guilt and giving because you’re grateful for all that God has given you.

God doesn’t just want us to do the Christian life. He wants us to want to.

Because when obedience flows out of love, it stops feeling like a chore and starts feeling like worship.