13 Reasons Why
My sister is one of the biggest book nerds I’ve ever known. So every birthday and Christmas she buys me a book that I’ve never heard of, one that is almost always awesome. A few years ago that book was 13 Reasons Why. A few months ago that book became a show on Netflix, suddenly teens and adults are paying attention to it. Without giving away to many spoilers, the book is about a high school girl named Hannah who committed suicide and left behind 13 stories on old cassette tapes about why she killed herself. Each one is how one student did something, sometimes something small, that contributed to her making that decision.
DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SHOW & BOOK
Now to state the obvious upfront, the show and the book are different. The book is centered around one of the people on the tapes who’s listening to them all through the course of a night. The show brings in several other perspectives of the other students on the tapes, parents, and the school’s administration responding. In other words they make it more dramatic for the sake of the show being more dimensional.
THE REVIEWS
There are so many mixed reviews out there for this story, some are applauding it for bringing attention to teenage suicide, bullying, and rape culture. Others are criticizing it for bad writing, romanticizing suicide, and promoting revenge. There are elements of truth in both of those critiques. Teenage suicide is something we like to pretend doesn’t exist even though it is the third leading cause of death in those 15-24 years old. And for every successful suicide, there are about 25 unsuccessful attempts. Around 30% of teens have been involved in bullying in some way, either as the victim or the antagonist. And people are talking about it more than they did before the show came out.
When I first read the book, I thought I wanted to buy every teen I knew a copy of the book because it gives a lot of insight into what their actions actually mean to others. It ended in the idea that you should help brighten someone else's day and reach out to people who you think might be struggling with depression. It called out what happens when bullying, drinking, and peer pressure go unchecked. A lot of youth pastor’s around the country are trying to figure out how to do series or have discussions based around this franchise.
THE DOWNSIDES
But despite the obvious upsides to the book, there are some downsides. The whole idea of trying to punish those who made your life miserable isn’t explicitly made in the book, but in the show it’s more obvious. Using suicide as a revenge tool should never be an option (not that suicide for any other reason should be an option) but that’s the message some could take away from the show. The show did a better job of trying to make it clear that the tapes weren’t necessarily a collection of definitive truth, that it was her perspective and that she might not always be telling the whole truth.
But for those who suffer from depression and suicidal thoughts, I don’t know if they’ll pick up on the fact that these people on the tapes didn’t actually kill Hannah, that she made her choice for herself and chose how she reacted to all the situations. Non-spoiler alert, she didn’t always make the right choices, but was still a victim. It’s not always a clear line between being a victim and blaming everyone else for your problems. The series portrays Hannah as helpless and powerless to change the things around her. That’s not a message I can support, but one that should be talked about.
THE UPSIDES
And that is why even with all it’s faults, I’d still say that it’s worth a read or a watch for most people. There are a few caveats of course. The first one is that you, the parent, should read and watch it with your kids. Talk to them about what you see. Ask them if they see these things going on in their own school. Ask them if they’ve experienced any of this first hand (or if they’ve done this to someone else). This could be an amazing tool to see what it’s really like for students.
Secondly, there are two scenes which are graphic. One is a rape scene, the other one is of the actual suicide. The producers included them for specific reasons, but a lot of experts are very critical of that choice. They happen in the last two episodes, which thankfully have a warning at the beginning of each episode. I strongly urge you to watch them first before your student does and use your own judgement on whether to skip those scenes or not.
The last caveat is that I would be more cautious with someone who is depressed and a hard no on someone who is suicidal. While this is a great warning tool for most people, it does have the potential to romanticize suicide and might nurture ideas they already have. If you think that might be the case, then get help now, don’t wait. Talk to teachers, counselors, the pastor, whoever you need to talk to that you can trust. There’s a national suicide hotline you can call at 1-800-273-8255. Let them know they are not alone. Show them you care for them. Get them help.
Blessings,
Nathan
Nathan Persell serves as our Youth Director. When he's not leading devotions and playing basketball with teenagers, he enjoys disc golf and bike riding. Learn more about Nathan here.
Come
From [Jesus] fullness we have all received, grace upon grace. The law indeed was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.
John 1:16–17 (NRSV)
Grace has come to mean a variety of things in our culture. The meanings range from a sense of beauty and poise to allowing someone to do wrong things without holding them accountable. That last definition is the one most often held to in the church.
In the church, grace has come to mean that no one should be held accountable to any standard of behavior unless it is someone else! If a fellow Christian is called out because of immoral of hurtful behavior, they will often play the “grace card” as a way of deflecting any accountability. In this vein grace is some expected or even demanded from others.
Grace is freely given
In many ways, this idea is far from the biblical notion of grace. First, in Scripture grace is never something expected or required, it a gift given solely at the discretion of the giver. Someone can choose to grant grace or not; they are under no obligation to give grace. Grace is given because the giver wants to do so, not because the recipient needs or deserves it.
Grace is unearned
Second, look at the popular definition: grace is unmerited favor. Notice what those words were taken separately mean. Unmerited denotes something that is not deserved or not earned. Something that is unmerited is given not because of anything in the recipient, its sole reason for being given is found in the giver.
Favor means the esteem one person grants another. Webster’s dictionary defines it as the friendly regard shown to another, in particular by a superior or approving consideration or attention given to another.
Taken together, grace is the friendly regard or approving consideration given to us by God not based on anything that we have done or not done nor any merit we may have ourselves.
Grace is a gift
Third, we need to understand that grace is not a force or a tool used by God, it is God’s disposition toward us and the motivation behind the things God does for us. For example, why did God choose Abraham and enable Sarah to give birth to a child when she had been barren for so many years? Because God had an undeserved and unmerited friendly regard for them. Why did God bring the Israelites out of captivity and make a covenant to be their God? Because God had an undeserved and unmerited friendly regard for them. Why did God choose to send Jesus to bear the consequences of sin on behalf of the whole human race? Because God had an undeserved and unmerited friendly regard for us.
It is that same undeserved and unmerited friendly regard that reaches out to every human that has ever been born and invites them into a relationship with God so that in turn they can be a vessel of undeserved and unmerited friendly regard for someone else.
That is grace! Join us this Sunday as we talk about how God’s grace reaches out to us even before we become followers of Jesus.
Blessings,
Alan
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Alan Cassady serves as Senior Pastor at Navarre UMC, and has been at the church since 2011. When he's not preaching and teaching, he enjoys sci-fi movies and FSU Football. Read more about Alan here.
What does Open Communion Mean?
Youth Pastors Debate
I’m part of an online community of youth pastors that try to help each other through tough times, wrestle through theological and practical issues within the church and crowd source ideas. With over 7,000 members from a multitude of denominations, things can sometimes get into debates and arguments over theology. Sometimes it’s over an issue the person never even knew would be controversial.
Recently, one of the members asked how other churches handled kids taking communion. It was a very innocent question, but I inadvertently turned it into an ugly battle. Up until I entered the conversation there were several people who had responded with it’s up to the parents or kids weren’t allowed to take communion. I made the comment that we practice open communion, so everybody is welcome to partake in communion, regardless of age, membership, or even if they believe in Jesus. We believe that it is a means of grace, and so God can work through the act of communion, even in those people that others would deem unworthy, to bring people closer to him.
Almost immediately someone said “Yikes! Serving it to nonbelievers?”. Because everyone is more bold when they aren’t face to face, I ashamedly replied “Yikes! Trying to judge who’s worthy of communion?” and the debate was on.
Communion Restrictions
For some of these youth pastors, this was the first time they had ever heard of kids or members of different denominations being invited to communion at a church that wasn’t theirs. They had gone their whole lives under the assumption that closed communion was the only way to do communion. Closed communion is where not everyone is invited to come forward. Sometimes the restrictions are that you have to be a member of that denomination, i.e. the Catholic church, sometimes the restriction is you have to be a member of that specific church and you can only ever take communion at that church, i.e. the baptist church my wife grew up in. To be fair, some United Methodist churches place a qualifier in there that all are welcome who love Jesus, or who are seeking after him, or something similar to that, but none of them ever directly ask the person receiving communion if they really do and it is almost impossible for a Methodist church to turn someone away from communion.
One person in particular said the act of serving communion to nonbelievers is making a mockery out of Christ’s suffering and sacrifice. His comments lead me to think about serving communion in a completely different way. In Romans 5 Paul said:
“You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God’s wrath through him! For if, while we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! Not only is this so, but we also boast in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.”
Jesus died for us while we were still sinners. He died for us before we even knew we needed a savior. When we take communion we are doing it in remembrance of him, his life, and his sacrifice. How can we say that Jesus died for us while we were ungodly but refuse to let those very same people take part in the remembrance of his sacrifice?
Obviously the matter wasn’t resolved online, but hopefully we all walked away with a better understanding of what different Christians believe and, more importantly, why we believe those things. For my part, I learned that our belief in prevenient grace, that God is actively reaching out to us before we even acknowledge our need for him, has so many more implications in our theology than I realized. It has made me thankful that it’s not about what we do in communion, but it’s about what God has done for us through his Son. In the simple act of taking a piece of bread and dipping it in some grape juice, even if we don’t fully believe, in that moment we have at least taken a step towards wanting more of Jesus in our lives and opened ourselves up for examination.
Nathan Persell serves as our Youth Director. When he's not leading devotions and playing basketball with teenagers, he enjoys disc golf and bike riding. Learn more about Nathan here.
The Cross for the World
I just returned from a trip to our nation’s capital, and I came away with a greater respect for our founders and the ideals that they wanted us to live out. Here are some of those ideals as spelled out in the Declaration of Independence:
“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”
Our founders put it all on the line for a set of ideals which they may not have lived to see come to pass. They knew that to prepare the way for these ideals would cost them everything, not just in money, but in honor and in their very lives. Here is the way they said it:
“And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.”
In Washington D.C., we encountered stories of sacrifice, honor, hardship and courage for the sake of an idea - an ideal from which we have benefited. I was amazed at the utter selflessness with which our ancestors endured all kinds of hardships to give us what we so often take for granted.
What if we approached the kingdom of God and indeed even our local congregation with that same kind of sacrifice? What if the Great Commission and the Great Commandment so captured our hearts that we would, “mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor”?
If that happened, I think we would see a picture of a New Testament Church! Instead, what we usually see is a consumer driven church where the comfort and entertainment of current members are paramount.
How different that is from the life Jesus modeled and the life Jesus called us to live. Notice the admonition Jesus gave those who aspired to follow him:
“Then he said to them all, ‘If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me. For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake will save it. What does it profit them if they gain the whole world, but lose or forfeit themselves?’”
I still see that kind of living, though it is rare. I see people who serve the poor and our youth and children out of a true sense of calling. I see people give, not out of compulsion, but because it is part of living as a disciple. I see people teach children, youth, and adults because they want to pass the faith along to others. I see people serving on committees and teams doing work behind the scenes for the sake of the ministry of the church.
These acts of service and sacrifice are necessary for the church to move forward. It reminds that just as Jesus suffered and died to inaugurate the kingdom, you and I will need to suffer and die to implement it. As N.T. Wright succinctly reminds us, “Love will always suffer.” If we love God, the church, children, the poor, the lost we will suffer for their sake.
It is time to see the ideals of the kingdom implemented. It is time to suffer and work so others can know the God we love and serve.
Blessings,
Alan
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Alan Cassady serves as Senior Pastor at Navarre UMC, and has been at the church since 2011. When he's not preaching and teaching, he enjoys sci-fi movies and FSU Football. Read more about Alan here.
Why I Chose United Methodist and Itineracy
“So when the apostles were with Jesus, they kept asking him, ‘Lord, has the time come for you to free Israel and restore our kingdom?’
He replied, ‘The Father alone has the authority to set those dates and times, and they are not for you to know. But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you. And you will be my witnesses, telling people about me everywhere—in Jerusalem, throughout Judea, in Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.’”
I went to seminary at Asbury Theological Seminary, which is not Methodist, but Wesleyan. United Methodists was the largest denomination present of the student population. I had classmates who were also from the Nazarene church, Salvation Army church, American Orthodox Church, Free Methodist Church, and many other Wesleyan traditions. One common question I got from people who weren't United Methodist was why I wanted to be an Elder in the United Methodist Church and be a part of the Itineracy system.
What is the Itineracy?
I'll start by explaining what the Itineracy system is. The Itineracy can be defined as:
“a distinctive pattern of deploying clergy for service in United Methodist congregations.”
In other words, it's our appointment system where Elders (or those of us who have accepted the vows to preach and serve the sacraments) are appointed to churches every year. The thing that is most commonly misstated is when a person's appointment is to a new church or charge, people say, "He/She was reappointed," when a person moves. That is true, but every pastor that year was reappointed.
You see, our Bishop appoints every pastor every year, whether it be to the church he/she is currently serving or to a different church. No matter what, the person is appointed. The language that is more accurate is that the pastor was appointed to a new church or moved.
Why Did I Choose this System?
For so many, when you look at the system from the outside, it seems stressful and it feels like there's no rhyme or reason to things. But, I love our system. The reason I love it is because our Bishop looks at every church in our conference and prays about where God is leading the conference as a whole and each individual church. Then, he asks God for direction in where pastors should be in the coming year. He then speaks to his District Superintendents (D.S.) about the churches and pastors in their districts and how they are all doing.
This system reminds me that my work in the local church is important, but it is also a part of something bigger. The vow I took at commissions is to go where God sends me, when he feels it is time. Our system relies on the lay persons in each church to help carry the spirit of the church through the years and to guide us.
Transition
Bishop Graves, our resident bishop, spoke these words in his message to our conference yesterday,
“I know for those moving and for those churches receiving a new pastor, this can be a stressful time. But instead of allowing the anxiety to overcome us, what would it look like to focus on the opportunity we have to live into God’s call for our personal ministry and for our churches? Change is always hard but it also presents a unique chance to start fresh and positively impact our local churches.”
You can watch all of Bishop Grave's message here. I'm praying for my future and your future. I'm praying that God will bless Navarre and bring forth new leaders through this time of change, helping the church stay strong. Ultimately, I'm praying for God's Kingdom on earth.
Blessings,
Faith
Faith Parry serves as our Associate Pastor, and has been at the church since 2015. When she's not preaching and teaching, she enjoys documentaries and TV. Read more about Faith here.